I drive. A lot. And for those that know me even the slightest, know that cyclists are not a girls best friend. Whilst I've never directly used them as target practice, I have had a few incidents which could have been avoided, if, say, the guy on the bike had a brain. Like the time one landed on the bonnet of my car because he jumped a red light. With his head phones on. And no helmet. Get off my car ass hat and cycle back to Shoreditch and consider yourself lucky you haven't dented my car. 

Replace the Bull with an Alfa Romeo and you get the idea... 

Replace the Bull with an Alfa Romeo and you get the idea... 

 

Anyhow, occasionally these guys, like other humans, need help. Mostly because the position cycling puts your back into is what we call a Kyphosis (hunchback is a more visually exciting term).  

Avoiding Kyphosis, or correcting it, is about strengthening the inter scapular area (between the shoulder blades). 

Lying on your front, arms by your sides. Draw the shoulders back and down and lift the arms to align with the back of the body. Float the head and chest off the floor. Hold, and lower. Repeat 10 times.  

Sit with your legs extended in front of you. Arms slightly behind you and fingers pointing towards your bottom. Lift the hips off the floor and push your chest towards the ceiling. Hold, and lower. Repeat 5 times. 

Hopefully now, you won't look like Quasimodo. 

If like me, cyclists keep falling onto the bonnet of your car, contact me here .

The cyclist wasn't hurt, unfortunately. I'm thinking of starting a charity for cyclists to help them buy actual cars.