This week will be my thirty-faux birthday. You know, one of those numbers that you really shouldn't have to disclose to anyone apart from your bank and HMRC. I've even casually lied to my GP. But only on the grounds it's easier to access hormone based contraception a few years before where I'm actually at now. And we don't want me becoming just another statistic on the single mother register. I wouldn't have anything funny to write to you about with a sprog and no household staff.
Then last night, after one too many Sancerres on a Monday with Verbena (all names have been changed to protect the identities of those women who drink on a Monday too), I got to thinking actually we don't need to hide our ages. Most people *read - women* I know, myself included obvs, are pretty f***ing fierce in life. Ok, one or two married a douchebag and got shafted for all their money, but on the whole, among them are: women at the top of their game in finance with global roles; serial entrepreneurs; women representing women in the UN; senior women in tech; and one who heads up a little company we know called Facebook. And me. I'm not changing the lives of women globally or running a billion dollar fund within a bank, but you know what? I wanted to be a ballerina. I made myself a ballerina. I wanted my own company? Had it up and running at 24. Which then got me thinking.... this isn't just my birthday.... this is my 10th year in business as BalletFit. And yes fact finders, if you add up the sums here you will have calculated I am 34. And still hot. So f**k it.
So, 10 years in and I couldn't be happier with my little enterprise. I'm not loaded enough yet, of course, so do continue all the good word of mouth recommendations. I'm quite ready for my own plane soon I think. Scheduled airlines just aren't what they used to be. That's you, BA, by the way. Anyhow, I digress.
So for BalletFit's 10th birthday, I am increasing our services on offer to include online mindfulness packages with the gorgeous Claire Karitzis. Via Skype, Claire can offer bespoke packages to include:
45 min consultation
daily yoga based exercises
morning and evening meditations
weekly review and evaluation
If you are ageing quicker than you'd like, I'd recommend Claire highly. If you want to look super hot, and stare at someone hot, you can train with Tamir. Or, if you want pilates at home with an ageing ex ballerina followed by nightly wine, you can, of course, still book me. Contact me here for any of the aforementioned services.
NB - Saturday sessions this week are of course cancelled. I will be colossally hungover in the foetal position watching back to back box sets, face down in a Mcnuggets sharebox after my birthday party on Friday. Normal service resumes once daylight no longer hurts my brain.